Do you really want to understand your mate? To do this you must realize this will be a continual reaching process. You must also realize this will be a continually reaching process. You must also realize to do this you must want to understand yourself.
To understand your mate, you must take a look at marriage and how you view it. In a solid marriage there is mutual respect and acceptance of each other. Are you building your life on the foundation that it is for life; on this principle two lives are merging to become one.
Three major principals contribute toward a successful marriage. First, the attitude each has for the other. Second, the attitude toward yourself. Third, the attitude you have toward your circumstances.
If you want to have a successful marriage you must learn how to get along with another person. A major step in getting along with your mate is realizing that you are two individuals with differences. You must accept your partner as they are not as you wish they were. Acceptance builds and strengthens self-confidence. Remember each of you see through different eyes. Don't compare your partner to anyone. No one was created to be alike.
Seek to become aware of each other's needs and how they can be met. Everyone needs to know they're appreciated so take the time to let your partner know they're appreciated.
You don't want to be taken for granted, you want to know you're loved and needed so does your partner. One of the greatest needs couples face is an emotional need. A need to enjoy each other and to let each other know their deep feelings. Get your partner to let you know how they feel about themselves, their life and goals for the family.
Men fail to realize that women often live by their emotions and at certain times emotions change. To have a love that is stable, you will learn how to suffer long and longer. When you fail, learn to trust God and seek his help. Seek to have your life be a challenge not a chore. For a marriage to be solid and happy, each partner must take seriously the responsibilities of marriage. A couple must continually plan goals for their marriage. Keep the line of communication open so that as situations change each partner can find a new course of action that is mutually agreeable.
Learning to respond happily to unplanned or unexpected times together could prove valuable to you. For you each need to know your companionship is enjoyed by the other. Finding mutual pleasure for the both of you may not always be easy. One may be sports-minded while the other may prefer reading or music.
A couple reaching for a growing, mature life are patient with each other and kind. They never keep a record of each other's wrongs. They never give up showing their faith and trust in each other. If you have a present arguement, don't bring up a past one, it was a different one besides it's gone.
Accept each stage of family living as fun whether you have small children, teenagers or it's just you and your mate.
Reach to help your mate fulfil their potential whether it is for some occupation, hobby, or an education.
Learning constructive criticism can be a major step for couples. Many mates tend to overreact when they feel they've been harshly criticized. Some people grow up with the feeling, they can't do anything right, since they have grown up with that they have the attitude that they are being constantly criticized. Since there are times when everyone needs to be criticized some, a major asset needed would be using the proper words.
A husband and wife may react different to the same situation. If a certain action from you brings anxiety to your mate work at overcoming that area. Whether it is being late for dinner or failing to tidy-up a certain part of the house. If you get criticized by your mate don't always feel you're being put down. Don't even give up on your mate always being somewhat critical.
Some couples find they have a particular time of stress or a particular hour of the day when they are easily irritated. Sometimes preparing yourself for situation conditions may enable your mind for what's coming and enable you to accept with inner quiet what could be a time of tension.
Encourage your mate to talk about their area of interest. Take and give your mate time in gathering their thoughts.
Reach for a life of growing together. Each day must become a challenge to help you bring out the best in each other.
It might be good to remind yourself I am the one that knows my mate's needs better than anyone and I am the one to fulfil them.
Don't expect your mate to be perfect all the time or you to be perfect in your mate's eyes at all times. Since we're all human, we tend to fail or annoy each other at times. Your main objective might be; don't be an explosive firecracker. When your mate reacts in a way that displeases you, take a deep breath, then with the proper words let your mate know how you feel. Hasty words create wounds that are sometimes hard to heal.
Learn to sort out together workable solutions to your differences. Appreciate that each of you have gifts and ideas to add to the home.
Your mate should be able to confide in you, their innermost thoughts.
Seek to recognize when your mate is tired. A physically or mentally tired person may have various reactions so you may not need to feel rejected during these times.
Couples fail to recognize how important complete sharing is in every area of life.
Self-control is a major virtue needed to maintain a happy and fulfilled life. It is much easier to do what you feel like doing rather than doing what you should. It's hard to be kind and understanding when you have a headache. It's not the major crisis that create family tensions but the minor ones. The intimate day-to-day relationship requires growing, reaching and giving.
Almost every couple face the in-law problem. Above all, don't compare in-laws. Each has their own identity. With understanding reach for a mature and happy relationship. Recognize some of the rejection you feel from your in-laws stimulates from the fact that they feel rejected by your mate (their child). They may need reassured by your mate of their importance. Your in-laws may need to recognize how important you and your mate are to each other.
It is your guidance that will help your mate become what you need and desire. You can't force your mate to do things. It will take a love that is patient. Always show your mate that you believe in them. Be realistic in your expectations of them. Remember to err is human. Even when your mate fails instill within them the hope to keep on trying. Be always alert to stimulate your mate's mental growth. Don't neglect to express daily in words your loving pride in your mate's work and knowledge.
Never stop reaching for your mate. If you tried to talk to your mate last night and they were tired or busy and said let's talk later,don't fail to talk if they want a conversation today. The old saying ; you hurt me, I'll hurt you only doubles the hurt.
Praise your partner for his good points. Always lift up your partner to others. The same circumstances can produce different emotions in a woman than in a man.
